According to the Associated Press, incoming US President Barack Obama wants eight hundred billion dollars for a stimulus package for – guess what?!? – public works, including highway and bridge repairs, renovating school classrooms and aid to cash-strapped states.
Also, he proposes to use a big chunk for immediate tax relief of around 500 dollars for individuals and 1,000 dollars for couples – y’know Little People Like You and Me™.
Unbelievable?
Maybe…
Eight hundred billion dollars is a LOT of money.
A WHOLE LOT OF MONEY!
Wherever could we find eight hundred billion dollars?
WAIT!!!
I know!
Just a few weeks back Hank Paulson threatened our government with martial law if we didn’t give his banker buddies – you guessed it – eight hundred billion dollars!! He said we’d have depression in a weekend if his bank buddies didn’t get that money, immediately, so they could help out all of the Little People Like You and Me™ who had bad loans.
As it turned out, Paulson was a dirty liar, and his filthy banker buddies didn’t give jack squat about that money except for the bulge in their bonus checks. And as to the dirty little details of where EXACTLY all the money really went???
Well, Hanky refuses to tell…
So, Mr. Obama – here’s a suggestion from a true Patriot:
Take Mr. Paulson down for a nice long private meeting with America’s “Information Retreival Specialists” at Guantanamo Bay. When those fine professionals have “extracted” from “Subject P” the whereabouts of Our Money,we’ll just go get it.
I know where you can find lots of highly trained US Military Personnel who are one plane flight out of Baghdad away from participating in the act of retreiving our money – using Overwhelming Force plus Shock and Awe if necessary (although I don’t imagine a bunch of cowering sniveling bankers are going to put up the kind of fight you get out of the Taliban).
Eight hundred billion dollars – it’s out there, waiting to be put to good use by and for us – you know – the Little People Like You and Me™.